According to the latest report in the New York Times, a famous astrologist
has made these predictions:
Sarah Palin will be elected Vice President of USA and then will divorce her
husband and marry Asif Ali Zardari.
President McCain will die of old age and natural causes.
Palin will become President of the USA.
After Palin gets killed by an unknown group of 'terrorists', her hastily
handwritten last will and testament will be discovered by her husband
Zardari.
Her will will say "Zardari will inherit my presidency after my
death".
This will be frantically waved (once) in front of the Congress. It will
than be put into an envelope and will replace the Declaration of
Independence document.
Zardari will become the next President of the USA.
Bilawal will change his name to BILAWAL BHUTTO PALIN ZARDARI.
The Republican Party will be renamed the Peoples Party of America, and Asif
Ali Zardari will also be Co-Chairman.
Lincoln Tunnel will be renamed as the Shaheed Mohtarma Benazir Bhutto
Underpass.
Times Square will be renamed as Shaheed Mohtarma Benazir Bhutto Chowk.
By Order, all government staff and the military will be required to loudly
scream 'Jiye Bhutto' with every salute.. thereby ensuring that the White
House resounds with the chanting of 'Jiye Bhutto'.
Jahangir Badr will take over as Secretary of State, while Sherry Rehman
will be installed as Press Secretary.
All the energy utility companies in America will be nationalized, and a new
institution known as Water and Power Development of America (WAPDA) will be
created to create, supply and manage America's energy needs.
Thereafter America will be introduced to the wonderful institution and
money saving measure of 'loadshedding'.
To bring the obese American nation to health, frequent 'food' shortages
will be created.
At long last, America will finally be at par with Pakistan and on the road
to riches!